


The Lies We Tell Ourselves

by Sunny_Lana



Category: Timeless (TV 2016)
Genre: Connor Mason is just trying to live, F/M, Flynn is trying to be detached, Garcy Fluff, Jiya and her premonitions, Just A Lot if Lies, Lyatt Pondering, Lyatt vs Garcy, My time couples, Post 2X06, Rufus/Jiya are pretty okay, Spoiler: it’s not working, The King of Delta Blues, time team - Freeform, who wins?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2019-04-30 03:45:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14488113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunny_Lana/pseuds/Sunny_Lana
Summary: They all have to tell themselves little lies to go on with life.Post 2x06: The King of Delta Blues, one-shot.





	The Lies We Tell Ourselves

**Author's Note:**

> The first part is from Lucy’s perspective only, because she’s easiest to gather it from, but it does take the others into account. Unbeta’d so sorry for grammatical errors. :)

Lucy wishes she could look at Wyatt without lying. These days, it’s nearly impossible. If she’s telling truths to anyone, it’s Flynn, and she’s not entirely sure what to make of that. Vodka and truths are what she gives Flynn; stolen glances and hard-sold lies are what Wyatt receives.

 

Wyatt Logan, Delta Squad extraordinaire, who now avoids her for a wife he hasn’t seen in six years. Of course, he once didn’t have the option to see Jessica before: she had been dead. And now that he did have options? Well, he had chosen which bed he wanted to lay in. Literally.

 

It’s much easier for Lucy to lie to him, because she has to be honest with herself. She has to be a better person, _the_ better person. Because she’s not going to compromise who she is for a man, no matter how deeply she cares about him.

 

Underneath her skin, though, is it obvious that she wants to? Sometimes she wonders what her downfall will be. She has endured Jessica and their conversation about the past, about her relationship and history with Wyatt. She has watched them reminiscing, and she has definitely heard them at night, “celebrating” their reunion.

 

It all burns like fire, but she doesn’t react except with lies and hiding her face. It’s better that way, Lucy thinks. It’s always better to play her characters and give out fake names and invent fake stories that pull her lies together and usually save the day.

 

Except then when she’s with Flynn, something comes loose. Her reality tilts and she realizes that no matter how much she did hate him, no matter how much crime he’s committed, he might just understand her. Maybe. She’s starting to believe it, how he’d said that he sometimes thought he knew her better than she knew herself.

 

It is scary how much he does know and how much they understand each other. By this point, things are coming together and puzzle pieces are fitting so that things are slightly less broken than before. Flynn feels like he’s part of her puzzle, an odd sensation, but not entirely unwelcoming. She embraces it because it takes away a little bit of the sting, and because it’s not entirely a lie, like everything else usually is.

 

And even if she tells herself she can make it through Wyatt and Jessica and _them_ , she has to run from it sometimes. It’s just one of the lies she tells herself. The other is that she can’t survive all of this madness - and that’s a lie too. She’s stronger than she’s ever been and she’s going to do what it takes to stop Rittenhouse, with or without the lies she has to tell behind the scenes.

 

 

And even if Wyatt tells himself is heart is wholly with Jessica, it’s just one of the things he has to tell himself, to make himself feel like he’s not drowning, like he’s not off the deep end completely. Because maybe his heart is torn and maybe he’s lying to himself. Because maybe he does have regrets when he looks at Lucy, just not the ones the others would think.

 

 

And even if Rufus tells Jiya that he’s not terrified of what’s to come, of knowing her premonitions - it’s just one of the things he has to tell himself to keep going, to make the next day count, to avoid wallowing in misery. And Jiya has to tell herself she’s doing the right thing, even if it’s the wrong thing and even when it’s somehow still right. It doesn’t make sense to her; her love for Rufus does. And that’s no lie.

 

 

And even if Flynn tells himself he can be emotionally detached from Lucy, well it’s just something he has to remind himself because otherwise he’d be in too deep. He knows her, knows her too well, and he knows how she can wrap her fingers around someone’s heart and pull and the heart comes to her all too easily. He doesn’t want to get trapped like the others usually do - or maybe he does. Sometimes all he wants is alcohol, sleep, and a bit of freedom, and that’s sometimes enough to convince himself that he doesn’t want Lucy, in any way, shape, or form. Sometimes.

 

 

And even if Denise Christopher sometimes wishes she was out of this whole mess and just safe and at home with her family, it’s not entirely how she feels, neither on the outside or on the inside. Because she sort of is at home with her family, and they’ve grown on her, even Flynn (in a minuscule way that she would never admit to, never in a million years). And she does love this little family that they’re building even if it is - hopefully - only temporary. But she’ll never stop believing in them, as much as she believes in her life back home.

 

 

And even if Connor Mason tells himself he doesn’t care about any of the rest or that he doesn’t give two licks about anything and just wants his own private oblivion, that’s probably his way of pushing you out. Because, more than anything, he probably just wants someone to stay, someone to tell him to get up and start caring and start fighting. He just wants someone to believe in him. But sometimes, he’s in his head and the lies build up inside.

 

 

They all tell themselves little lies, little falsehoods, because its easier and safer and smarter and less likely to lead them to be killed in the end. Because if they just let go of their feelings, things seem smoother. But when the truths come in rare spurts, they break down into themselves, and find strength, and have hope, and truly do care. But they still tell themselves lies, and they go on another day, saving and changing history and telling themselves that it’s more important to fight for their ideas of love and peace and justice and forgiveness and hope and yes, even truth, than the ideas of pain and failure and detachment that Rittenhouse would sell. And that’s the whole truth...because they know they’re right.


End file.
